中午看电视，一个北京台的节目背景音乐放的是Nelly的over and over，追回差不多3年前，刚到北京上学的时候ipod里总循环放着这歌！时间过得真快！生活变化真大！

直到今天才看到这首歌歌词，才知道什么意思！哎~

Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I cant keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I cant take it
I cant shake it, no

I can't wait to see you
Wanna see if you still got that look in your eye
That one you had for me before we said our goodbyes
And it's a shame that we gotta spend our time
Being mad about the same things
Over and over again
About the same thing
Over and over again
Oh but I think she’s leaving
Oh man she's leaving
I don't know what else to do
Can't go on not loving you
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I cant keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I cant take it
I cant shake it, no

I remember the day you left
I remember the last breath you took right in front of me
When you said that you would leave
I was to damn stubborn to try to stop you or say anything
But I see clearly now
And this choice I make keeps playing in my head
Over and over again
Playing in my head over and over again
Oh I think she's leaving,
Oh man she's leaving,
I don't know what else to do
I can't go on not loving you
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I cant keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I cant take it
I cant shake it, no

Now that I've realized
That I'm going down
From all this pain you put me through
Every time I close my eyes I lock it down
I can't go on not loving you
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I cant keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I cant take it
I cant shake it, no
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I cant keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad
Cuz its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I cant take it
I cant shake it, no

Over and over again
Over and over again
Cuz its all in my head

 

一次又一次的失去...................

下雪了，夹着风雪花飘在空中真美！我站在阳台算着手里的已经连着抽掉了5根烟！

打雷了，不知道为什么雪跟雷能同时出现，头顶上昏黄的灯光好像已经跟着我度过了好几年！

secondhand serenade 08年专辑里有一首歌叫《Your call》其中有句歌词是i was born to tell you i love you反复地听伴随着夜里的雪花跟雷声真让人悲伤！

人的感情真他妈脆弱真他妈矛盾，其实所有人都一样，纠结着！不论到什么时候！

突然觉得自己很蠢，其实从来没觉得骗过别人一直骗的都是自己，但可能别人永远不会这么想，也更看不到什么！感情世界里永远都没有明白这一说！

还要这么过多久？晚上经常问问自己！觉得自己懂得爱的时候主动跳下了悬崖，然后发现悬崖很深往上看看不到头，自认年轻慢慢爬吧以为总会看到希望，但希望很多时候自己根本争取不到，因为太深了到后来也不想在爬了！

在漆黑的深渊里继续做个骗子吧！

骗自己！

挺好..........

 

 

 

 

secondhand serenade 《Your Call》

 

Waiting for your
call im sick
call im angry
call im desperate for your voice
listening to the song we used to sing
in the car do you remember
butterflies eary summer
its playing on repeat
just like when we would meet
like when we would meet
Secondhand Serenade

i was born to tell you i love you
and i am torn to do what i have to
to make you mine stay with me tonight
stripped and polished
i am new
i am fresh
i am feeling so ambitious
you and me
flesh to flesh cuz every breath that you will take when you are sitting next to me
will bring life into my deepest hopes
whats your fantasy
whats your [whats your whats your]
 
i was born to tell you i love you
and i am torn to do what i have to
to make you mine stay with me tonight
and im tired of being all alone
and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home  

 
i was born to tell you i love you
and i am torn to do what i have to
and i was born to tell you i love you
and i am torn to do what i have to
to make you mine stay with me tonight

 

我用尽所有方式 找个人给我安慰
渡过寂寞的黑夜
我问守护的天使 也许她能够体会
这无助让我好累
走到无路可退 我还能相信谁
用多少天 用多少年的跌跌撞撞才找到终点
用多少伤痛的心爱才不离开身边
用多少谎言去掩饰彼此的不完美
要用多少个世纪让我看透一切
我走在这个城市 熟悉又陌生的脸
有谁能给我安慰
我没有任何防备 没方向到处地追
没翅膀却好想飞
我努力顺风跟随
黑或白找不到个绝对 全都是灰

我真失败！

也哭不出来了！

我不想腐烂死在家里

我走了再见！

 

莫名其妙的疲倦，真累！

 

秋天真的会让人烦躁不安，19号又是一个通宵的夜晚，我裹着被子在被窝里，感觉眼睛是全部睁开的但是只能看见一半的东西，脚很冷从来没感觉过的寒冷，我缩成了一团头像被人拿锥子在敲打一样的疼我才意识到我病了，我睡不着保持一个固定的姿势只感觉到脚很冷很冷冷的我一直在打哆嗦，我真怀疑我是不是睡在家里，吐了拉，拉了吐，就这熬了一夜我终于睡着了，一睁眼下午3点了发现自己还活着就是依然头疼眼晕给妈妈打了电话想从她那里等到些唯一的关心，虽然我知道这回让她担心！

家里没有泰诺这个药，只有个感康，我想下楼买药但身体跟我说不行于是妥协身体，磕了片感康，吃之前没觉得这药能对我怎样，因为我从来也不信这牌子，但出乎意料21号一起床发现自己好多了！只是有些轻微的头疼了，浑身也有劲了，下楼吃了几个包子喝了碗粥买了眼药水还有泰诺，街上刮着大风发现秋天来了，但是一个个奇怪的人看着他们的穿着也根本分不出来是什么季节，买了本上厕所时需要的三八杂志，戴着帽子低着头匆匆忙忙的走，很像电影经常看到的场景！

眼看着这一年又将过去！09发生了这么多事！抗住的没抗住的，得意的失意的，需要保留的或者马上删除的，以后可以跟别人说09年我都过来了还有什么可怕的！

每次听着velvet我总能想起再纽约的那段时光........

 

 

Sing For China 美国巡演 http://modernskyent.com/singforchina/

•Sept. 5 - Hocofest (Tucson, AZ)
•9月5 - Hocofest（亚利桑那州图森）

•Sept. 6 - The Che Cafe, UCSD (San Diego, CA)
•9月6 -The Che Cafe，加州大学圣迭戈分校（加利福尼亚州圣迭戈）

•Sept. 8 - Silverlake Lounge (Los Angeles, CA)
•9月8 -Silverlake Lounge（洛杉矶，加州）

•Sept. 9 - Bottom Of The Hill (San Francisco, CA)
•9月9 -Bottom Of The Hill（加州旧金山底）

•Sept. 11 - Artistery w/ Panther (Portland, OR)
•9月11 - Artistery w/ Panther（波特兰）

•Sept. 12 - Oregon State University (Corvalis, OR)
•9月12 -俄勒冈州立大学

•Sept. 14 - El Corazon (Seattle, WA)
•9月14 -El Corazon（西雅图，华盛顿州）

•Sept. 15 - The Urban Lounge (Salt Lake City, UT)
•9月15 -The Urban Lounge（盐湖城，UT斯达康）

•Sept. 16 - Sokol Underground (Omaha, NE)
•9月16 -Sokol Underground（奥马哈）

•Sept. 17 - University of Minnesota, St. Paul Student Center (St. Paul, MN)
•9月17 -明尼苏达州圣保罗大学学生中心（圣保罗，明尼苏达州）

•Sept. 18 - Iowa State University (Ames, IA)
•9月18 -爱荷华州立大学（艾姆斯，美国衣阿华）

•Sept. 19 - Purdue University (Lafayette, IN)
•9月19 -普渡大学（拉法叶）

•Sept. 20 - Lager House (Detroit, MI)
•9月20 - Lager House（密歇根州底特律市）

•Sept. 24 - Bennett Media Studio (New York, NY)
•9月24 -Bennett媒体工作室（纽约）

•Sept. 25 - Modern Sky Festival NYC @ Columbia University (New York, NY)
•9月25 -摩登天空音乐节@纽约哥伦比亚大学（纽约）

•Sept. 27 - Chinese Culture Festival (Washington, DC)
•9月27 -中国文化节（华盛顿）